To Ease the Passing of Time

About seventy years ago, in a small village of northern Ontario, people said that a guy was born with two heads. Actually, it looked like two guys who were born with a body that both of them had to share. In fact, there were two bodies with two sets of organs inside and everything, but they were connected. At that time, doctors and specialists could not do anything to separate them. Each head was a completely different person who liked to eat in different restaurants, go to theaters to watch different movies, listen to different types of music, be with different people, etc.

Since they were both Catholics, their parents had them baptized a few days after they were born. On was named Paul and the other Henry. Paul was more accepting of his condition than Henry. He rarely complained. For him, even if it was very hard never to be alone, especially when going to the toilet, it was something that he was willing to accept because they were told by their priest that it was God’s will. Henry, on the other hand, was full of resentment towards God. He cursed Him and did not want to go to church.

 Dicephalic parapagus twins

Life was not easy for either of them. While Paul would have preferred to go for a walk in the forest because he liked peace and quiet, Henry wanted to go the mall in Sudbury where he could see girls and action movies. A simple thing like watching TV was very complicated. Usually, Paul had to sit through the programs that Henry wanted to watch even if he hated them. Dressing was also a heck of a problem: imagine trying to coordinate your arms and legs controlled by two different brains in order to put on a shirt and a pair of pants.

Since they each had their own vocal cords, their voices were different. Paul’s was softer and gentler while Henry’s was louder and sounded more aggressive. Paul would have liked to sit down to paint and draw but Henry had no patience for that. He wanted to go hunting and fishing.

Forget about dating girls! It was impossible to find a girl who would have been willing to put up with a guy who had to share his body with his brother. There would never be any intimacy and privacy in their relationship. It was a little bit easier with male friends. They had a few friends in common with whom they could have conversations. The friend’s head would turn towards the one of the two heads doing the talking.

Paul and Henry died of some complications due to their condition shortly after they turned twenty. When they got to the other side, Saint Peter was waiting for them at Heaven’s big golden door. He adjusted his glasses and looked at their status in The Big Book. They were no computers in heaven at that time, and I don’t think there are any today.

Saint Peter raised his eyes from the book and said, “It says that you, Paul, are going to heaven; and that you, Henry, are going to hell.”

Henry said, “How the hell are you going to do that? Are you going to cut us in two, and send one half of our body to heaven and the other to hell?

“That’s exactly what I had in mind, yes”, said the keeper of the door.

“Paul said, “I’m not going to separate from my brother to go to heaven without him. I love him and I became very attached to him…figuratively as well as literally. I would rather go to hell with my brother than go to heaven without him.”

“Let me talk to God. I’ll be back in a few seconds.", said Saint Peter.

Saint Peter disappeared and came back a few seconds later. “It’s all settled, he said. “Both of you may go to heaven. And he added, “Paul, God said that the love you have for your brother is what saved him.” And then he turned to Henry and said, “And you, Henry, you should consider yourself lucky that your brother has so much love for you even if you are a jerk.”

Then, Saint Peter took the big gold key given to him by Jesus to open Heaven’s big golden door and let the twin brothers in.

 Jesus giving the keys to Heaven to Saint Peter

The reason why I wrote this article is because I always felt very sorry for the children who are born with that condition. I just cannot imagine what it would be like never to be alone.

Here is a brief description of that rare condition: They are dicephalic parapagus twins (having two heads joined to one torso), and are highly symmetric for conjoined twins, giving the appearance of having a single body without marked variation from typical proportions. Each has a heart, stomach, spine, pair of lungs, and spinal cord.