To Ease the Passing of Time

He had always wanted to be known as someone that he was not because he did not like, or did not really know, who he really was. When he was young, he was a very promising hockey player. Everybody in his small town and the other small towns around knew him. They all thought he would have a brilliant career. That was who he was at the time: the young and very talented hockey player who would make it into the major leagues one day. His father pushed him to the limit of what he was able to accomplish hoping that he would make it to the top. He did not. Even if he was very good, he was not quite good enough for The NHL. His father was very disappointed in him.

Later, he studied to become an engineer. He went to work for a big company and made a discovery that made him quite famous. His father was very proud of him but that was not enough; he wanted his son to quit his job and start his own company. He did. He started his own company and gave it his name, his father's name.. It soon became his new identity. It was not a very big company; it was more like a regional company. His father said that his company had the potential to become a multinational with subsidiaries all over the world. He said that he should be more ambitious.

Since he provided his little town with almost a hundred jobs, and also because everybody liked him, he was easily elected when he ran for mayor. Again, his father was very proud of him but he told him that he should go for MP (Member of Parliament) and even minister in the government. But he knew that he did not have what it takes to become a real politician.

He got married twice but it did not last. At almost 40 he had a son and a daughter from two different women. His father died after his second divorce. He told him on his death bed that he was very disappointed in him, that he could have accomplished a lot more with the opportunities that he had.

He was in Miami for a convention when he turned 40. Like many horny men on a business trip, he called a prostitute. Her name was Candy. She had big boobs and her full lips were red like cherries. He did not put his Viagra in his carry-on bag when he left his little town near Calgary and his suitcase was lost; it ended up in Alaska with his Viagra in it. Since he was always so tense and worried about everything, without the little blue magical pill he could not get it up. Candy said, “Let’s go for a walk on the beach instead.” He said, “What the fuck, we might as well.”

They took a long walk on the beach under the full moon and he told her about his life. He told her about his father who was an immigrant who had big dreams for him; he told her that he could not make his father’s dream come true not matter how much he tried. Candy stopped walking. She took his hands gently in her hands, looked him in the eyes and said, “You are wasting your life because of your father. His wanted to use you to achieve his dreams. You have a life of your own. You are what you are and that’s perfect.” He started crying like a child. She held him in her arms. When they returned to the hotel he was a different man.

Before she left he asked her, “Is Candy your real name?”

She said, “Of course not! My real name is Eileen, Eileen Rooney. I’m an Irish girl from Massachusetts who went to school with Catholic nuns.”

“Will I see you again?” he asked.

She answered, “I don’t think so. Our lives are too different, but I’m sure you’ll find someone who will love you for what you are if you start loving and accepting yourself for what you are instead of what your father would have liked you to become.”